Saturday 23 February 2008

SF

I forgive myself that I have allowed myself to be angry at myself because I am sick.
I forgive myself that I have allowed myself to see “being sick” as a punishment.
I forgive myself that I have allowed myself to judge myself because I’m sick again.
I forgive myself that I have allowed myself to fear that I might not go to Berlin because I might still be sick then.
I forgive myself that I have allowed myself to be kind of happy cause then I might not have to go to Berlin cause I’m sick.
I forgive myself that I have allowed myself not wanting to go to Berlin because I will be with my class for 5 days almost every fucking minute.
I forgive myself that I have allowed myself not wanting to go to Berlin because I fear that I might not have any time to do self forgiveness.
I forgive myself that I have allowed myself to fear missing the train to Berlin.
I forgive myself that I have allowed myself to fear that Berlin is going to be boring.
I forgive myself that I have allowed myself to fear that because I don’t want to go out and party, the people of my class are going to be weird at me.
I forgive myself that I have allowed myself to fear the food in the hotel in Berlin.
I forgive myself that I have allowed myself to fear that something might happen to me while I’m in Berlin.
I forgive myself that I have allowed myself to fear the reaction of my “friends” when they see that all I want to do is calm things and no partying.
I forgive myself that I have allowed myself to believe that there is no way that I can still be myself while being away with school.
I forgive myself that I haven’t allowed myself to consider that I can still breath and stop thoughts while being in Berlin.

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