Showing posts with label ego. Show all posts
Showing posts with label ego. Show all posts

Saturday, 13 July 2013

Day 221: Who’s the Bad Guy? Who’s to Blame? - Part 2

This blog is a continuation to the otter story in Day 222: Who’s the Bad Guy? Who’s to Blame? – Part 1.

ARKive image GES033998 - African clawless otter What most people will do when they find out they have a ‘predator problem’, is to find the animal and kill, say by trapping it, gunning it or putting out bait with poison. Killings may not occur anymore and it looks like the situation is ‘fixed’. This is however a very limited way of looking at things, where we look at a problem in isolation of its context. We’re in fact not really fixing anything by just ‘killing the animal’, but merely removing a symptom of a bigger problem.

Each animal has a very specific habitat/environment which supports it, which is supposed to provide the animal with its suitable diet. When a disequilibrium takes place in any one of the points that keeps everything going / keeps everything in place in terms of having a functional ecosystem where all are supported, things start going wrong one by one.

15COVER-articleLarge If you take the otter for instance, he’s supposed to be eating fish, crabs and frogs. He is living in a ‘humanized’ area where there is not much ‘wild nature’ available for him to thrive. There are limitations like fences and waters which have been polluted due to human activity. Now there are no crabs and fish around, and he doesn’t have much other place to go that would be more suitable in the direct environment. So now he’s eating whatever else he can get his hands on: ducks, geese, chickens, random birds. He does not really want to eat these animals but was forced to because his environment was out of harmony. Now we have for instance a situation where we have no more male ducks left and thus the ducks have no way of making babies (though we can just buy more males, but this is not always possible in every situation). So there, another point of disharmony has been created which will have further consequence. When I put out birdseed for the wild birds in the morning by the river, I also see a lot of his poop lying around. What’s interesting here is that he is not even able to digest the meat he is eating properly. There are lots of undigested pieces of meat present in his poo. So obviously, this diet is not for him. So it’s really kind of a lose-lose situation where ducks and geese are dying and at the same time they are dying so he can sustain himself but it’s not really doing the job.

endciv_11x17_web So it’s easy to go ‘oooh look, there’s the culprit! Damn otter!!’ – but he is also just being a victim of his environment and the conditions he found himself within. We can then keep on pointing at each little point that was out of place somewhere down the line that caused him / drove him to the behaviour he currently adopted for the sake of survival. The thing is that, just like with the money system, we can’t just fix nature and the animals by only changing ‘one point’. Nature and the Animal Kingdom are one whole, one interconnected system. To fix one problem you really have to always go back to the whole and ensure that the whole system is sound and in a state of harmony in all ways. If you look at Nature, it is quite fine working and sustaining itself, by itself, when left alone. Once you bring in the human factor, disharmony starts occurring as we through our ignorance and arrogance start appropriating land that we believe are ‘entitled’ to, which animals then lose. So if we really want to point fingers for these type of events where predators come and eat livestock – it’s really a matter of pointing it at yourself since the human has been the main cause of disrupting harmony in the nature and animal kingdom. We are also the only one’s who are in a position to fix this and to restore balance to the earth.
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Monday, 15 October 2012

Day 79: What Have I Done?

This blog is a continuation to:
Day 76: Wanting to be Liked
Day 77: Confessions of a Child Junkie
Day 78: Self-Rejection

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to when I saw my nephew do the exact same thing when I was younger, as in laughing at things on the same show without knowing what exactly was funny about it – have seen this as the ‘perfect opportunity’ to get back for myself what I perceived had been ‘stolen from me’ – where I felt like it was now my turn / time to be in a superior position, and decided to ‘catch him out’ in what he was doing, the same way as how my siblings had done to me – where I accepted and allowed myself to believe that it was my ‘right’ to do this and that it was now my turn to make someone else feel bad

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have caught out my nephew in what he was doing as laughing at things where he didn’t really know what he was laughing at – from the starting point of ‘getting back’ at my brother and sister through making my nephew feel bad – where I went and stole his energy for the sake of compensating the energy I had lost when I was smaller when the same thing happened with my siblings and me – where I accepted and allowed myself to believe that I was now ‘getting even’ within catching out my nephew in what he was doing

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have caught out my nephew in what he was doing as laughing at things there he didn’t really know what he was laughing at – without for a moment considering how this would affect him even though I had experienced first-hand what I went through when it happened to me – where I only cared about getting an energy surge from catching him out on his pretence and within that feel all high and mighty within having busted him for something I could clearly see he was not comfortable with (in terms of not getting the humour) – where I felt so clever for having picked up on this and having caught him out so I could make myself feel better about myself within making him feel worse about himself

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to just have gone ‘with it’ when seeing the opportunity to gain back the energy I once lost as a child – where I immediately went, ‘yes, yes – this is what I must do let me do this’ in an almost “Gollum” like way, being single-mindedly focused on getting my precious energy back without considering the consequence of my actions or how my actions would influence the other person

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have been shocked at what I was seeing as the expression on my nephew’s face after I had ‘caught him out’ – as all of a sudden I found myself being faced with myself all those years ago and it was as if I was staring myself in the face – and the face was hurt, where I felt like I had cheated on myself within doing unto him what had been done unto me without for a moment considering that for me to feel good, I would have to make him feel bad – which was exactly how it played out/what happened – but then as I was faced with his expression I only too late realised the ‘reality’ of what I had done, where I had been so concerned/obsessed with only my own personal “wellbeing” that I completely forgot/disregarded how I had felt when it had been done unto me – and so I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself to within that moment where I saw the opportunity to do unto another as had been done unto me – to have stopped within the realisation that I did not like what had happened, and that it would thus be hypocritical / a lie to do it unto another, and within that moment stop participating within the temptation of energy and ground myself back here within my human physical body

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to ‘after the facts’ as seeing the hurt expression on my nephews face and realising what I just had done – have gone and hide behind my mom because the realisation of what I had done was just too painful/uncomfortable to bear – as I had been very upset at my brother and sister for what they had done all those years ago and yet I now had placed myself in that exact same position – where I felt like I was completely evil and went into regret as shame and embarrassment for having cheated on myself within making my nephew feel how I did not want to feel – and where instead of looking at what I had done and what processes were involved to get to a point of accumulation where I acted out what had been done unto me and correcting myself – I went into hiding and suppression and try to forget what just had happened because I found myself too shocked/perplexed to handle what had just happened / what I had just done – where I went to hide behind my mom and kind of suck on my fingers/play with them in my mouth as a point of self-suppression instead of taking responsibility for what I had done – although I also see / realise / understand that I could only have done so much within not having been taught/educated on how the mind processes work and why I was tempted to do unto my nephew what had been done unto me – where at the same time I would have been able to use myself as a reference within the point of being aware that I was acting out a form of ‘payback’ and kind of in the back of my mind knowing that this was ‘not cool’ – where I could have stopped myself right then and there just on that point
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Thursday, 31 May 2012

Day 8: Know it All

When I made my first trip to the farm, I thought I had a pretty good idea of how everything worked and that I had a good understanding of the Desteni principles.
 Was I in for a surprise.
 Already on my first day of arrival this turned out to be untrue. Although I had participated quite a lot on the old Desteni forum -- I found out that I didn't know shit. I was faced with an environment where other people were actually applying the principles and this was way beyond what I had conceived through my "knowledge" that I had accumulated. Once more I realised how small my "bubble" really was -- especially when listening to the interdimensional beings telling their stories on cold winter nights by the fire. It's like there's a whole reality right here in front of our eyes -- but we can't see it. All we can see is this world which we call ''reality" which is not even a publicly shared reality but our own private, customization of what we want to see.
 And the only reason why we can't see is because of the accepted and allowed emotions, feelings and thoughts which override the real factual world. And this 'layer' through which we filter everything we see keeps us from seeing what is really going on.
I remember the one night I was sitting in the lounge, and I was going through a particular experience and I couldn't pinpoint what it was (how ridiculous is that anyway, that you as a being can experience things -- and then not know what the hell it is, I mean it’s inside you it IS YOU -- again just showing how limited we are no matter how far gone we are in "history" and no matter how "evolved" we consider ourselves to be). Bernard was in the lounge and the Portal as well -- there might have been some other people around but I can't remember. Then at some point Bernard asked to whoever was in the body to leave and get my liver in.
So there I sat on the couch, facing and talking to my liver (well mostly my liver talking to me). In the meantime Bernard was pushing all sorts of points on my back, triggering all kinds of experiences. My liver would then tell me exactly what I was experiencing and, how come I was experiencing, what past memories were involved -- the whole deal.
I was astonished.
My liver knew freakin more about me than I knew about myself. I mean, do I even know how my liver works or where it even sits inside my body? And here it is explaining to me what I've accepted and allowed myself to become in the nitty grittiest detail. Obviously -- I knew nothing at all.

I highly recommend the available downloads on the EQAFE website and the Heaven's Journey to Life blogs which allow one to have a 'peek' at what actually goes on inside ourselves and the world -- and to assist ourselves in lifting the Veils of our Minds so we may finally SEE and create a World that's Best for All.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that “I know it all”
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to settle for my limited awareness and knowledge as “this is it”
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be blind
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe my perception of the world
I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself to see and realise – that when different people have different perceptions about the world – that this is extremely odd
I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself to question my own perception and that of others when I realise that different people have different perceptions – there is only one world – how can everyone have a different version of the same reality we share?
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to dismiss this observation and instead stand by what “I” perceive and act and live according to that
I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself to question my perception, what I see and even more so – what I don’t see
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that I know how I work and that I know how the world works
I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself to see and realise that I know shit and that I need other people to help me in understanding how the world works and to cross-reference our different “realities” so we can break down all the different various divisions between each one’s own “reality” so we may come back down to Earth and share the same reality as what is actually here
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have believed that I could figure things out on my own
I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself to see and realise the extent of limitation existent within myself as the mind and that I need other people to assist and support me in challenging these limitations
I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself to see and realise that I need other people to challenge these limitations – as I have become these limitations and thus do not see them, am not aware of them myself
I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself to be humble in accepting and asking for assistance in understanding and seeing how the inner and outer reality really work
I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself to see and realise that my own liver is superior to me in every single way as it knows exactly who it is and on top of that it knows exactly who I am – I don’t know either
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to neglect and dismiss the physical aspect of our reality while this is the very aspect which allows me to live my life and have my illusionary bubble
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be completely unaware of what goes on inside me and how I as the mind and the physical actually operate
I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself to admit that I need others to assist me with seeing what I have accepted and allowed myself to become
I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself to see and realise that “my awareness” is completely worthless and actually not awareness at all

I commit myself to investigate my beliefs and perceptions and deconstruct them in order to go beyond the layers of deception and see what is really going on
I commit myself to no longer ignore and dismiss the physical within the realisation that it is the only thing which is real
I commit myself to expose how everyone’s mind bubble is merely a customized illusion and is not real in fact
I commit myself to assist and support myself, and others as myself to get back down to Earth and work with what is here – instead of being preoccupied in our illusionary reality bubbles which do not match and created unnecessary friction and conflict within the world
I commit myself to humbleness and allow myself to be assisted by others in breaking down my false awareness
I commit myself to a single awareness and the breaking down of all separate realities so we may all come to common ground and create a world that Best for All
I commit myself to the 7 Year Journey to Life, to release myself from my self-imposed limitations and expand my awareness
I commit myself to question any and all beliefs
I commit myself to make use of the information provided by Desteni through various platforms and media as I understand that I cannot walk this process alone
I commit myself to support Desteni so others may receive the same assistance and support as I have been given