Wednesday, 3 October 2012

Day 68: My Mind, My Saviour

 This blog is a continuation to:
Day 62: There Must be Something Wrong!
Day 63: Keeping the Wheels Turning
Day 64: Holding on to Myself 
Day 65: Fear of Sharing
Day 66: Valuing my Inner Space 
Day 67: You can HEAR me?!

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have defined my mind as my own private place where I can do what I want

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have defined ‘freedom’ as ‘doing what I want’

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to cherish my mind as my ‘private space’ where I can apparently do whatever I want

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that my mind is special and that I must value / cherish my mind – as that thing which allows me to do what I want and where I can entertain myself within whichever way I want

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that my mind constitutes as the ‘highlight’ of my day – where whatever I face, I can go and play in my mind and entertain myself in order to not face my reality

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have believed that my mind was the most awesomest thing in the world, where in any given moment I could decide to not participate in the world but instead seal myself in my mind and entertain myself there with thoughts, feelings and emotions

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have believed my mind to be this vast universe / playground where I can do whatever I want – where I could at any moment withdraw myself from physical reality such as being in class and generate happy thoughts/feeling/emotions inside myself to keep me happy/entertained

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that my mind is a place of comfort, where at any given moment I can withdraw from reality and go sit in my mind as a cocoon that will keep me safe from whatever is happening in physical reality

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have abdicated my power to the mind – where I believed that my mind is here for me and here to take care of me – while all the while it is all in reverse – where my mind is not ‘keeping me safe’ or ‘helping me through tough times’ – since the problem was never what was happening in my physical reality, but my interpretation of the event as experience which was created through my mind

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that I was doing myself a favour by withdrawing into my mind and entertain myself with thoughts/feelings and emotions – while all I was doing was hiding from myself as creator of my experience

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that the problem lay in what was happening around me – instead of seeing and realising that what I perceived was ‘happening around me’ as negative experience, was actually happening inside myself – and thus I was the problem all along


When and as I see myself associating ‘freedom’ with ‘doing what I want’ – I stop and I breathe – I see and realise that ‘freedom’ can never exist as the statement of ‘doing what I want’ in an absolute, eternal way – since this interpretation of freedom considers the person who’s freedom is being discussed as being at the ‘centre of the universe’ where nothing else matters but this person – while in fact, we do not live in a reality where each one is at the centre of the universe – we live in a shared reality where everyone’s actions have repercussions affecting others – and so freedom, is really a point of realisation of responsibility – where each one can see and identify the consequences for any action taken, and within that consideration only act within a way which is Best for All – as only within this manner can we ensure a co-existence which is Best for All – where currently the concept of ‘Freedom’ is only considered within an isolated framework from the starting point of each person being at the centre of their own universe – but there is no such thing as separate realities, we all share the same reality, the same planet – and the moment we allow each individual to believe in the illusion that they are at the centre of their own universe where they should have the right to do what they want – these separate realities create friction as this ‘doing what I want’ is affecting/inflicting consequence on one another – and so I commit myself to let go of my old definition of freedom, and live by a definition of Freedom which in fact stands for what is Best for All Life

When and as I see myself withdrawing into my mind upon facing something which I perceive as ‘unpleasant’ within the belief that I can go into ‘my own little private space’ where ‘I can still make up the rules’ – I stop and I breathe – I see and realise that I am in fact deluding myself within believing that withdrawing into my mind is a solution to any given situation – where this very movement is a statement of me accepting my self-limitation – and so I commit myself to snap out of self-hiding – breathe – be here as my human physical body, and face whatever I need to face
When and as I see myself going into my mind and going into a ‘yay’ mode – where I am chuffed with myself that I can for a moment escape from my reality – where this is almost a form of ‘cheating’ – I stop and I breathe – I see and realise that I am being completely delusional within believing this ‘yay’ moment of having made an successful escape into and as my mind where I can think and feel things while stuff is going on around me that I do not want to be aware of, as I am merely removing myself from what is Real and engaging in an alternate reality – and so I commit myself to stop and breathe, ground myself as my human physical body and identify what triggered the defence mechanism of ‘escape’ into my mind and walk this point within Self Forgiveness and Self-Corrective Statements

When and as I see myself experiencing myself in an unpleasant way in relation to what is going on around me, and then go into my mind as a ‘solution’ to this experience where I go and either be numb or create nice feelings/thoughts for myself – I stop and I breathe – I see and realise that I am playing tricks on myself where I believe my environment to be the cause of my ‘unpleasant’ experience and where my mind can play the ‘saviour’ within creating nice feelings inside myself – while in fact I am the creator of the unpleasant experience in relation to my environment and also the creator of the pleasant experience within generating deliberate thoughts/feelings – and so I commit myself to stop deluding myself within believing that I am creating a solution for my problem, since I see and realise that I created ‘my problem’ and I created ‘my solution’ and so I move myself to step backwards from having created the happy feelings back to having the ‘negative’ experience BACK to what triggered me creating a negative experience for myself – and sort out this link within Self Forgiveness and Self Corrective Statements and Application

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