Sunday, 3 March 2013

Day 192: Giving up on Myself - Happiness Drone (Part 3)

This blog is a continuation to:
Day 190: Giving up on Myself - The Spoiled Brat Syndrome 

Day 191: Giving up on Myself - My Life is so Rough (Part 2)

I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself to see and realise that the ease of my life was only possible by someone else compensating/making up for it

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have been completely ignorant in relation to my reality and what was behind my reality to make it possible for me to live the life I had

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that I had the right to only ever to do 'what I want' without seeing and realising that if this would have been a universal principle we'd all be dead right now because some things simply need to be done to make life possible whether I /we want to do it or not

I forgive myself that I haven't accepted and allowed myself to see and realise that one can only do 'what I want' if one has money -- where if you have money and others don’t you have leverage to get people to do the things you want them to do to get what you want in life -- where this is only possible if others stand in service/bondage to you through money -- where we end up in a world where a few have a lot of money and everyone else's life is in service for those few to live their dream while sacrificing their life and any form of dignity in the process

I forgive myself that i haven't accepted and allowed myself to ever look at the things I had in life and ask myself 'where do they come from', 'who made them', 'how did it get here', 'what resources was used to make this'-- where within not asking these basic questions I was indicating that I don't care who made it and how it got here, how this may have affected other people/the earth and that all I care about is that I have it and can use it as I please so that I can have 'my happiness'

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have become a happiness drone where all I care about is experiencing some energy/vibe that 'makes me feel good and will fight, reject and avoid anything that may threaten MY happiness, not caring how this attitude may in turn affect other's people's happiness because I just don't care

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not care

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want to be cared for yet not wanting to return this service to others / care for others

I forgive myself that I haven't accepted and allowed myself to see and realise that within not caring for others I am tacitly giving permission to others to not care for me

I forgive myself that I haven't accepted and allowed myself to see and realise that being cared for but not caring for others comes at a cost

I forgive myself that I haven't accepted and allowed myself to see and realise that if I was at the other side of the coin in conditions of hardship, I would want someone to care about me and my situation


Enhanced by Zemanta
Post a Comment