Saturday, 14 June 2008

some more

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be jealous at all the people that are going to SA.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear I won’t be able to go to SA.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear I won’t have enough money to go so SA.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want, need, and desire to go to SA.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear if I still got my summer vacation job as I haven’t heard from them anymore…

Lolol, ok I’ve just sent them e-mail to check if I’m still in hehe..

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear that mom won’t let me go.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear that if I’m not allowed to go to SA, and I do not want to study, I will have to do a crappy job in order to keep my parents off my back.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear that I will be stuck in this house with my parents for ever

I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself to realise that one day eventually me or my parents will die so I won’t be stuck with them here forever.

I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself to trust myself that I will get my ass over to SA eventually.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe I will have more fun in SA then I will have here.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that me having fun and enjoying me is dependant on places, and thus based on separation.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear taking a plane though I have no real reason too.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear taking a plane cause it’s something I’ve never done before.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear things I have never done before because I fear that I won’t be able to do it as it is my first time lol.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that there is no room for mis takes in my life.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that mis takes are unacceptable
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