Sunday, 4 November 2012

Day 99: Stress Management - Part 2

This blog is a continuation to:
Day 98: Stress Management


I forgive myself that I haven't accepted and allowed myself to breathe effectively -- where within moments of my day I will allow myself to go into my mind as backchat, ideas, opinions, beliefs, judgments about my day, my schedule and my tasks -- whereby instead of being here within and as breath -- I allow myself to access alternate dimensions with energetic charges and impose them unto me and my day/tasks/schedule -- where when I find myself dealing with a particular task/point, I am not really dealing with the task/point at hand -- but instead allow myself to veer off into the dimensions of my mind where I have created an idea about what I am doing, which then creates friction as energy within me which I then accept and allow myself to be influenced by in terms of accumulating stress and/or changing my behaviour in accordance to the ideas/beliefs/judgments I accessed

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not breathe effectively within my day -- where I allow moments/gaps within my day where I go and look at my schedule from the starting point of 'choice' where I believe that I could be doing other things which I like more -- and then contrast my experience of what I am doing / what I am going to be doing with the experience of what I would rather be doing and within that put downward pressure on myself within believing that I am in an unfavourable position and have to 'struggle my way through' -- without seeing and realising that I am creating the experience of struggle/stress within contrasting/comparing experiences of the different things I could be doing -- where these experiences aren't even real in terms of being directly implied by the task -- but experiences I have made up in my mind where I decided that 'with this task goes this experience' and within that creating unfavourable conditions for myself

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to interpret my schedule and classify each point within a segment of 'what I want to do' and 'what I don't want to do' -- where I still move myself to go through my schedule regardless of my judgment/energetic experience linked towards what I do -- but wherein not having addressed my judgment/backchat about the point I am dealing with -- I go into a point of 'opportunity cost', where I experience a sense of 'sacrifice' within doing what I have to do and foregoing what I would rather be doing -- not seeing and realising that I am within that participating within the delusion of choice -- not seeing and realising that there is no choice involved and that I will be doing what requires to be done regardless of my preference as likes and dislikes -- and so I might as well get over with it and not distract myself with such 'dreams'

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to when and as I find myself experience a point of 'struggle' or 'stress' in relation to my schedule/tasks at hand -- to immediately go into the point of "it must be my schedule which is the problem" -- without for a moment assessing who I am in relation to my schedule and see what I can change there, for me to able to work with my schedule effectively within my day

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to allow experiences to accumulate, where within day upon day accessing particular views/opinions about my schedule, I am adding one more layer of stress within myself -- where when the point comes of 'wanting to explode' -- it is already too late, indicating that I have missed many breaths and not effectively evaluated and corrected my self-application within my day within every moment of breath

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to into dimensions of what I 'rather would be doing' and waste my time there -- instead of moving through the schedule I have layed out for myself within seeing/realising that this is what requires to be done and is the only way I am able to address all the points which require addressing within my day -- and within that I forgive myself that I haven't accepted and allowed myself to have looked at those tasks in my day which require attention every single day without exception -- where I should have identified any point of backchat/judgment about these points a long time ago and have addressed them within seeing/realising that this is what I will be doing every single day, over and over until it is done -- and that there is thus no point to judge it or make something 'bad' about it -- as I then only place myself in a precarious position of having to deal with this negative energy everyday which is commonsensically going to accumulate if I do not address it from the get go


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