Friday, 14 September 2012

Day 50: Here -- Yet Lightyears away

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to never have questioned the nature of thoughts, feelings and emotions

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to never have questioned how I will experience myself differently in different moments / day to day

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to never have questioned where thoughts come from and how they manifest

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to never have questioned the origin of thought or how it is able to exist

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to only consider what I experience to be 'reality'

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to take what I experience as 'reality' as 'a given' and trust this experience to be real / valid -- and never look beyond what I experience

I forgive myself that I haven't accepted and allowed myself to see and realise that within only giving attention to 'what I experience' I am limiting my awareness to only myself as my mind and completely disregard the physical reality

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to never have questioned how come I am here as a physical body in a physical reality -- yet in no way understand/grasp what it means to be here as my body as this physical reality -- where I am here and yet at the same time lightyears away from what is here



I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have never cared to find out what it means to be here as the physical -- but simply assumed it to be of no relevance and that the only thing which matters is me as my mind and how I experience myself


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to within not caring/ considering this physical reality create/contribute to abuse within this world -- as this abuse merely reflects another way of not caring/considering and thus within every moment that I am not caring/considering the physical reality I am authorizing abuse to exist within this world

I forgive myself that I haven't accepted and allowed myself to see and realise that any form of activism or wanting to bring about change in the world without ensuring that no thought exist within me is complete hypocrisy -- as I am demanding consideration of this physical reality without stopping my own thoughts which eat my flesh away which is the primary form of abuse existent within this world

I forgive myself that I haven't accepted and allowed myself to see and realise that the only activism worthwhile participating in is within the act of stopping thoughts, feelings and emotions -- as they are the very personification of abuse, where real, actual substance gets consumed for the sake creating energy as thoughts, feelings and emotions -- and where these thoughts, feelings and emotion do not serve us well in any way whatsoever anyway --- it's like a lose-lose situation!

I forgive myself that I haven't accepted and allowed myself to embrace the sadness of being here in this physical reality and yet at the same time having no real access to this physical reality -- because it really is sad

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have considered the physical as 'not important' / 'irrelevant' -- without seeing and realising that I never actually experienced physical reality -- and so the only thing I actually ever deemed as 'not important' / 'irrelevant' -- is me as my experience of the mind as it is completely limited -- where I projected this limitation unto the physical and believed it to be real -- instead of seeing and realising that it is not the physical which is limited but my mind, and where I as the mind can't stand that I do not have access to this physical reality and within that 'dismiss' / 'spite' it in order to make myself feel better where I will look down upon physical reality as a coping mechanism within the realisiation/truth that I am less/inferior than this physical reality because when I as my Personality Die -- I am Gone -- but the physical remains

I commit myself to show that the nature of the human as the nature of the mind as thoughts, feelings and emotions has never really been investigated

I commit myself to show that the nature of thoughts, feelings and emotions is actually really disturbing

I commit myself to show that any call for change without stopping thoughts, feelings and emotions is pure hypocrisy

I commit myself to show that as long as the nature of the mind is not understood we will not change and the Earth will not survive our continued exploitation

I commit myself to show that any opinion/observation of reality as the physical has only ever been an opinion as we've never accepted and allowed ourselves to step beyond our mind and really see / investigate what is here

I commit myself to show that we've accepted and allowed ourselves to have become an alien invasion where we are here in this physical reality but have no actual relationship with the physical in anyway whatsoever where we are completely closed off and locked/jailed in our minds and really have no clue about what really goes on on Earth

I commit myself to show that any form of abuse in relation to the physical is inherent to our inferiority of and as the mind where we can't stand that the physical reality is more real than we are and then try to 'get back' at the physical reality through abuse and torture to make ourselves feel better in the limited time we have available on Earth before our meaningless existence disappears into thin air after Death

I commit myself to show that the tendency of the human to see itself as 'intelligent' and 'superior' to all other beings / living organisms on Earth is just another way to deal with our sense of rejection -- where we are the outsiders in physical reality and within our resentment towards ourselves take it out on what is Real within Spite and Jealousy -- and then cover it up within apparently being this 'amazing' / 'evolved' being which is a complete state of denial and delusion
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Wednesday, 12 September 2012

Day 49: Studying and Fear - Part 3

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to when I am reading through my study material -- read from the starting point of fear as 'I have to know all this information -- what if I forget all of this information by the time of the exams, then I have to do it all over again' and "oh no so much to read and so little time' -- where within this starting point as an energetic state of mind of fear -- I am not at all grasping / integrating the information but merely reading the words for the sake of 'progressing through my material' without actually studying/reading in any way whatsoever

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have made it my goal to 'go through the material from beginning to end' without including understanding/integration within my starting point -- where I end up "studying" but really just wasting my time because I am in no way present here within the moment as the information presented

I forgive myself that I haven't accepted and allowed myself to slow down within studying -- to allow myself to read and take in the information within understanding and to when I do not grasp / understand something go and look up additional information which may assist me in understanding the point

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to take on studying within a starting point of resistance -- where I anticipate that the reading wil be tedious and that I will forget most of it -- and within that I forgive myself that I haven't accepted and allowed myself to see and realise that this experience is a decision I make for myself and then becomes my reality -- and thus I can decide to take on studying from a point of self-directive self-movement and taking in information effectively

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to base my 'future' study experiences on my study experiences from the past as memories -- where I end up not being able to integrate the information effectively since I am busy recycling through past memories

When and as I see myself reading through my study material and thinking "I have to know all this information -- what if I forget all of this information by the time of the exams, then i have to do it all over again" -- I stop and I breathe -- I see and realise that fear and thinking/worrying only takes me another step back towards exam preparations and so I commit myself to stop participating within such thoughts / energy experiences and allow myself to work through my material step by step within allowing myself to effectively integrate the information

When and as I see myself reading through my study material and thinking "Oh no so much to read and so little time" -- I stop and I breathe -- I see and realise that within occupying myself with these thoughts I am leaving myself no time/space to integrate my study information effectively and so I commit myself to stop participating within these thoughts / energy experiences and actually get to studying

When and as I see myself studying from the starting point of 'getting from point A to B' as in 'progressing through my study material' -- I stop and I breathe -- I see and realise that within focusing on the 'end goal' as 'getting somewhere' I am completely losing the point of studying as I am in no way aware within studying -- and so I commit myself to re-establish my starting point as effective reading /understanding where 'progressing through the material' is an outflow of this point -- but not the main point of attention

When and as I see myself racing within my mind when studying -- I stop and I breathe -- I see and realise that rushing within my mind and through my study material is in no way effective and is actually me wasting time within wanting to save time -- and so I commit myself to stop engaging in this energetic mind experience and allow myself to slow down and be here

When and as I see myself deciding to study within an energetic experience of resistance -- I stop and I breathe -- I see and realise that within imposing an experience of resistance upon and within myself -- I am only limiting myself and my study experience -- and so I commit myself to re-establish my starting point to that of self-direction and self-movement and study / take in the information unconditionally

When and as I see myself accessing past experiences in relation to studies as memories and project them unto the current moment -- I stop and I breathe -- I see and realise that within accessing that past as memories I am only holding myself back from studying effectively and merely repeating the past -- and so I commit myself to snap myself out of this mode and be present here within the moment as breath and take in the information presented effectively
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Monday, 10 September 2012

Day 48: Studying and Fear - Part 2

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to when one of my friends/classmates regurgitated our textbook information of the exam we were about to do - have gone into fear when I realised that I cannot do this - I can't reproduce all the information perfectly/by heart - and within that lost all trust within myself within doing the exam - because I believed that I need to be able to repeat the textbook information perfectly

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to when one of my friends/classmates regurgitated our textbook information of the exam we were about to do - have observed the behaviour / reactions of my other classmates, where they were all panicking because they couldn't repeat the textbook information the same way she did - and where I looked at myself not panicking and then thinking I should panic because everyone else is panicking, I should also panic because just like them I don't know all this information by heart

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to take on the fear of others within believing that if everyone responds to fear within a certain situation - that this situation requires to be responded to with fear - where it is 'normal' to go into fear - instead of assessing the information within common sense practicality for myself

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that fear is real and that since everyone participates in fear, that it is something which is 'good' for us to participate in - without ever questioning the nature of fear as self-limitation where fear can never be good for oneself because even if one is in a danger situation, within accessing fear one's only placing more strain on oneself which leaves one less aware of the environment and more susceptible to the danger

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that if you are able to repeat information perfectly without looking at the information on paper - that this means that you 'know' the material and that you'll be able to pass the exam

I forgive myself that I haven't accepted and allowed myself to see and realise that if you are able to repeat information perfectly without looking at the information on paper - that this means that you are able to sequence words/information just like they are on the paper without looking - but this does not imply any form of understanding - where one could for instance have learnt all the information of a textbook by heart but then fail the exam because one is not able to place the information with the corresponding questions - because the actual nature/essence of the material has not been understood as what the text is about, where one only focused on the 'picture presentation' of the material as the sequence of words without having any form of comprehension

I forgive myself that I haven't accepted and allowed myself to trust myself unconditionally within that moment of seeing everyone panic in the face of the girl being able to repeat everything perfectly - where I knew that my study method worked because I had done it over and over again and always worked out - where I trusted myself in being able to answer the exam questions based on my understanding of the material / underlying dynamics/mechanics of what we had learnt and thus from within that point of comprehension be able to produce a perfectly adequate answer to any question pertaining the material

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to within that moment of seeing the girl being perfectly able to repeat the information and seeing everyone else panic - have lost complete trust in myself and my studying ability because I hadn't considered learning everything by heart because it just seemed like too much of a fuss - but now that I saw her doing it I felt like I had made the wrong decision and that my 'laziness' had gotten the best of me or something - within the belief that if you don't suffer during studying (which I felt 'learning by heart' was) - that something's wrong and that you're not doing it right / cheating the studying process and within that I forgive myself that I haven't accepted and allowed myself to see and realise that studying does not have to equal suffering

When and as I see myself reacting within fear to someone being able to regurgitate information from a textbook perfectly -- I stop and I breathe -- I see and realise that I am entering a point of distrust within myself as self-doubt, even though my experience has shown that I can study and pass exams without memorizing information verbatim. Within that I commit myself to stop my fear and re-establish my self-trust

When and as I see myself observing others' behaviour in relation to an event -- and feeling compelled to adopt the same behaviour within the belief that 'if everyone's doing it, it must be the right/suitable thing to do within this particular situaiton' -- I stop and I Breathe -- I see and realise that the observation that 'if everyone is doing it, it must be right' - is not valid, as I have seen for myself that the world works in reverse -- and thus I commit myself to within moments where I want to 'follow the crowd' stop, check what is going on -- what behaviour I am trying to follow and flag it to work on within Self Forgiveness and Self Corrective Statements

When and as I see myself reacting within fear to a situation when I see everyone else also doing it -- I stop and I breathe -- I see and realise that fear does not assist and support me so I stop myself and trust myself to not participate within fear, even when everyone else is doing this. I commit myself to look at the event and the fear it triggered and release myself from the connection/relationship of the event and the fear connected to it

I commit myself to show that fear is not normal nor 'supportive' in anyway whatsoever and is in fact a behavioural disorder we've all accepted and allowed within ourselves -- and just because everyone is doing it does not mean it's "okay"

When and as I see myself access the belief that 'if one is able to memorize information and spill it out perfectly one knows the material' in relation to studying -- I stop and I breathe -- I see and realise that it is just that = a belief -- and does not have any practical relation to reality. I commit myself to show that our current educational system does not care about the effective integration of information within teaching as it teaches children to memorize information and are satisfied if they can regurgitate this without testing for actual understanding -- where all our current educational system cares about is performance goals, and where thus accordingly children will only care about 'goals' as 'grades' where they will do what it takes to get high grades without where students will memorise information and then spill it out during exams/tests and right after forget all about it -- revealing how ineffective our education system as become

I commit myself to trust myself within studying and to take the time to take in the information within understanding

When and as I see myself access the belief that 'if you're not suffering while studying, you're doing it wrong' -- I stop and I breathe -- I see and realise that this is just an idea/belief I created and imposed on myself. And within that I commit myself to show that one does not have to 'suffer' while suffering and that it is possible to simply integrate the information within self-trust and access it when needed

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Saturday, 8 September 2012

Day 47: Studying and Fear

When I used to study and prepare for exams I was usually quite chilled and relaxed. I would start studying the day or two days before on the 'bigger' subjects -- where I would read through the material and make sure I understood everything. This method worked very well for me and my grades were always good. I wouldn't be able to sum up all the information by heart, but in the moment of exam and going through each of the questions, I would be able to just by looking at the words and understanding the question -- give the according answers based on my understanding of the subject material.

My last period of exams I experienced as being a 'rough patch' and I experienced a lot of stress/anxiety in relation to the exams not being able to remember all the information. I thought this was really weird considering that throughout highschool I never had any problems like this in terms of really being 'freaked out'. I mean, I would have some anxiety/nervousness but I knew that I could trust that in the moment that I am faced with the exam, I can 'conjure up' the information by reading the question and I also made a habit out of not looking at the information just before the exam but just trust myself that I'd be able to access the information I needed during the exam.

Then I remembered this one memory of something that happened during one of my last exams in highschool. Me and my class were standing infront of the classroom where our exam was going to be, and this one girl which everyone considered to be quite intelligent was busy regurgitating information from the subject -- completely verbatim from our textbook. At first I was just impressed like 'Woaw, she actually learnt all of that by heart?". But then I saw my other classmates panicking because they weren't able to re-produce the information as perfect as she was doing it -- and within that moment I checked whether I could re-produce it like that... and I couldn't! Then I quickly 5 min before the exam (which was against my rules lol) I would try and memorise the information, try and hold on to it real bad and then the moment we got our exam papers quickly write it down before the information would disappear.

What I realised is that since that happened, I changed my studying method where I used to simply read and trust myself -- to reading from a starting point of fear as the fear of not being able to remember/re-produce the information. So as I am reading I am just going 'fear, fear, fear' -- and so not really taking in / allowing myself to understand the information because I am already fearing losing the information that I do not even get to taking it in, in the first place! Lol

Somewhere by the end of our last exam period I had gotten to a point where I simply 'gave up' on trying to memorize all the information, because it was simple 'too much' in terms of the amount of information that I would have to memorise and the amount of time I had available until the exam -- so I decided that it was just not worth it because I found it very strenuous and I wasn't going to be able to cover all the information. So then I simply read the information and was actually calm within 'having given up' and realising that there wasn't anything more that I could do -- and then this time I was actually able to process the information effectively and work with it well during the exam!

So now I have to 'walk back' in time and get back to how I used to trust myself within studying and get this fear out of the way.

Self Forgiveness and Self Corrective Statements to Follow 

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Friday, 7 September 2012

Day 46: Running on Automated Pilot

I forgive myself that I haven't accepted and allowed myself to consider my body within walking / moving / standing

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to move/walk/posture my body according to how I feel within my mind -- where how I move/walk/stand reflects my state of mind -- without ever stopping for a moment and asking whether how I move/stand/walk is in fact effective in terms of how the human physical body is designed to function

I forgive myself that I haven't accepted and allowed myself to see and realise that I have only ever used my body to support my mind / how I experience myself as thoughts/feelings/emotions -- where I use my body to reflect/express my state of mind, where my state of mind is always within the framework of polarity as unbalance and where thus equal and one my body will reflect this unbalance within me moving/walking/standing in an unbalanced manner -- and within that compromising my body within not using it in a balanced, stable manner

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to take my human physical body for granted -- where my attention only lies within my mind as 'what I want to do' and expect my body to just perform from 'point A to B' as 'what I want to do / where I want to be' and 'being there/doing it' -- without being here as my body from point A to B -- and within that move/walk/stand from an 'automated pilote/mind' perspective where I expect my mind to give my body directions as to how to do things -- without seeing and realising that the mind only values the mind and will only work with the body in terms of how it can support the mind, and so will not direct the body in a way that is best for the body, but compromise the body for the sake of supporting the mind

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have abdicated my self-responsibility of handling my body in a way that is supportive within not being here within every moment of breath and expecting my mind to just 'take care of things' during my absence

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to expect my mind to 'handle things' -- while I have clearly seen and understood that the mind is not trustworthy and only cares for its own survival -- and so within not moving myself to be here within every moment of breath and handle my body responsibly -- I am deliberately being negligent and deliberately allowing my body to be compromised because I didn't feel like 'being here' and 'doing it myself'

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have deemed my hypermobility as an 'obstacle' / 'obstruction' that I have to overcome in order to be able to 'get to things' -- instead of seeing and realising that I can use this point of hypermobility to 'get to things' as a point of physical support to show me how I should and shouldn't move according to my physical design

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have created a Character to deal with my human body and how to move / stand / walk -- instead of being here as my human physical body/moving myself within self-direction / self-movement

When and as I see myself walking / moving / standing around within an automated pilot mode -- where I am not being the directive principle of every single movement -- I stop and I breathe -- I see and realise that I am accepting and allowing myself to compromise my human physical body for the sake of the comfort of my mind and so I commit myself to breathe, be here, take charge of myself as my human physical body and move/handle myself in a way that is supportive within the consideration of how the human physical body as been designed

When and as I see myself allowing my mind to 'take charge' while I am absent and entertaining myself within my mind -- I stop and I breathe -- I see and realise that I cannot leave the responsiblity of handling my human physical body to my mind, as my mind is only interested in supporting itself and will abuse the body through handling it in ways that does not lie within its design/functionality -- which is a promise for physical deterioration -- and so I commit myself to be here within every moment of breath and take on the point of responsibility to move my human physical body as myself

When and as I see myself reacting to pains resulting from hypermobility -- I stop and I breathe -- I see and realise that my body is merely being extra sensitive in terms of how I move/walk/stand -- and thus I can use this as an indicator to show me who I am within moving myself as my body and so I commit myself to utilise this point of hypermobility as a gift to assist and support myself to be aware of my movements as my human physical body and correct my body movements from mind to body movements within consideration of the physical and to no longer accept and allow my human physical body's movements and postures to be an extension/support of the mind -- but use my human physical body to move out of my accepted and allowed programming / characters and move into Life as the Physical within the principle of what is Best for All

Wednesday, 5 September 2012

Day 45: Who am I as my Body?

Today while I was cooking I noticed I had a pain in my hip. At first I went "Oh no, where does this come from now?" -- where I started going into my mind and 'look out there' for what this pain might mean-- and then I stopped myself and for a moment just assessed how I was "being here" in terms of how I was busy cooking -- and I noticed that I was actually standing in a very uncomfortable position, and suddenly it became very obvious why my hip was in pain -- I was creating it by not being aware of how I moving and how I was positioning myself while cooking. I had shifted all my wait unto one leg while letting my one hip 'stick out' to the side -- accumulating pressure on one leg. The moment I re-shifted and balanced my weight and just stood straight, the pain dissipated.

I have this thing where my joints are overflexible (hypermobility), and throughout my teenage years I've worked a lot on developing muscle around all my joints to support them in keeping in place. While I was sick I lost a lot of muscle tissue and now I've been noticing it more easily when I am not using my body in a way that is structurally supportive, as previously my muscles would just "buffer" for how I was carrying myself, but now that those muscles are gone I can see it more clearly when I am moving myself from the starting point of the mind. I'll go and access my 'automated pilot' where move myself according to memory as how I used to things before I was sick, but then I'll get a quick reminder through pain or exhaustion that this is not how it works anymore -- and so I am forced to re-assess my movements and really consider how I move myself in this physical reality and get out of my head.

I realised I have never really looked at how I move and if I'm even moving the way my human physical body was supposed to move. Sometimes Gian and I, when we're at the mall and taking a little break, we'll just sit and observe how people walk/move/carry themselves -- and it's interesting to see that you can pick up on their Character designs just by looking at how they walk, where you just see walking Characters and no-one walking in a way that actually assists and support themselves, but only to support the mind while diminishing the physical.

This point also opened up while I was listening to the whale interviews, where the whale explained how they can specifically see/read a body's history in for instance one injury/misalignment -- where they can see how the injury was created, how the mind compensated for the injury and all the ways it affected one's life.

Self Forgiveness and Self Corrective Statements to Follow

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Monday, 3 September 2012

Day 44: Taking Things Personal

 This is a continuation to Day 42: Why?

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have taken it personal when I walked with the teacher to our classroom after I fell and the teacher simply kept silent throughout our walk – where I accepted and allowed myself have come to the conclusion that what happened was ‘normal’ and ‘nothing out of the ordinary’ – and where furthermore I concluded that what happened was ‘just’ in the sense that I had deserved what happened, within the belief that it was implied by her silence

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have interpreted the teacher’s silence – within believing that it meant that ‘nothing was wrong’ and that ‘what happened, happened for a reason’ where I accepted and allowed myself to believe this reason to be ‘me’ and as such, there was ‘nothing to say about it’ – and within that I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself to see and realise that the silence did not imply anything per se – where the assumptions I made as apparent “implications” were of my own creation, reflecting my own attitude towards myself back to myself – and so within taking the behaviour of the teacher personal, I was in fact only accessing judgments/beliefs/ideas already existent within me and projecting them unto the teacher as if they were in fact emanating from her – while they were not, it was all coming from myself

I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself to within that moment of “pondering” what this silence “might mean” – to stop, and realise that I am creating something, making something more out of a situation that what it really is

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to always try and figure out what “the meaning” of things is that happen to me and my reality

I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself to see and realise that within trying to find out what ‘the meaning’ is of something, I am in fact separating myself from what happened / is going on – where I go into a mode of ‘speculating’ what it might mean and then decide to make whatever speculation ‘suits me best’ a reality for myself, within deciding that “this happened for that reason” – and so entertain myself within a separate, ‘customized’ version of reality – where events have particular meanings and implications and where I believe those meanings and implications to be true – without seeing and realising that I made them up in an attempt to never be here as this physical reality and deal with what actually goes on within this World and the atrocity that has become of Life on Earth

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that taking things personal is normal / the way of Life – where “taking things personal” is just human nature and so we shouldn’t really do anything about it because it is ‘who we are’

I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself to ever question the nature and existence of “taking things personal” – as “taking things personal” is actually a form of mental disorder as one is creating and holding on to a distorted version of reality within oneself, which self holds to be ‘true’ and ‘evident’ – while it is actually all made up, and where we are okay with everyone doing this

I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself to see and realise that “taking things personal” is not normal, and not acceptable behaviour – as one is within “taking things personal” removing themselves from reality, and within doing so, basing their actions and behaviour on a modified version of reality which is not coherent with how things work in fact – leading us humans to act in irrational, destructive ways and justifying it under ‘everyone takes things personal, it’s just who we are’ – without ever questioning the implications of such a statement of acceptance and the door to abuse it opens towards the real, actual, physical reality which is being completely disregarded within us only paying attention to our own ‘version’ of things as our judgments, opinions, beliefs, perspectives, points of view

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have taken the teacher’s silence personal after the event of me falling after I had been pushed by someone else, where I believed that the ‘push’ and the ‘fall’ were personal – and so I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that the boy pushing/shoving me out of the way ‘meant’ something, within the sense of it being ‘personal’ and ‘specifically’ pertaining to me – without seeing and realising that the actions of the boy weren’t personal – but in fact a statement of humanity as a whole – where within the action of the boy pushing me to the ground for the sake of being able to continue playing his game – causing real physical damage and pain -- is the result of education of parents and society as a whole as the result of our values and principles, where the boy within that one singular moment simply revealed that we human beings value our personal energetic mind reality more than the physical reality we all share – where the boy could have only performed this action if we all agreed that this is acceptable, otherwise he would not have been taught that such behaviour is ‘okay’ and ‘acceptable’ and so the action would have never occurred within his mind – but it DID – and so I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have blamed the boy, and blamed him personally for my experience – instead of seeing and realising that he was merely demonstrating our values as humanity as a whole, and as such I cannot blame him, and I cannot take his actions personal either – as I am both creator and victim of my own creation as I am part of the whole who decides what is acceptable and what not – where my own actions which occurred after the event also clearly indicated that I value personal mind energetic reality more than the physical reality which we all share within assuming and taking things personal and victimizing myself – and so there is no point blaming the boy, as that would just be hypocrisy and an attempt to shift responsibility away from myself


When and as I see myself observing someone’s behaviour and ‘making something out of it’ within having thoughts about it – I stop and I breathe – I see and realise that I am assigning a value judgment to the situation and within that altering reality for myself within that moment – where consequently I lose grip with reality and am no longer able to make trustworthy decisions – as I have clearly revealed to myself within my writing that when I go and ‘interpret’ things – I end up diminishing and compromising myself within placing self-limiting beliefs unto myself – and so I commit myself to stop all thoughts when observing someone’s behaviour so I may remain here, as this physical reality and not get lost on some other imaginary plane of existence

When and as I see myself observing someone’s behaviour, and assign a particular value / meaning to it – I stop and I breathe – I see and realise that this value / meaning is not coming from the other person but comes from me – where this value/meaning is not ‘given’ within the situation, but a decision I make to be what I want it to be – and so I stop and commit myself to look at what I have revealed to myself within interpreting someone’s behaviour, apply Self Forgiveness and Self Corrective Statements as such events indicate to me that there are still Characters at play which I haven’t considered / addressed properly before

When and as I see myself ‘pondering’ within ‘trying to figure out the meaning behind something’ – I stop and I breathe – I see and realise that I am participating within creating a mental disorder within creating alternate versions of reality – where I am distracting myself from what is actually going on within this physical reality, where I accepted and allowed myself to assign ‘value’ and ‘meaning’ to reality as if it really has that meaning in fact, while it just my own personal made-up meaning, where I end up creating meanings about everything within my world as ‘opinion’ – where each time I am looking at something in the world, I am not really looking at what it is, but only observing my interpretation of what it is as my opinion, and so I have locked myself away from reality where it is just out of reach – literally creating a bubble around myself where everything I see and experience is actually just myself as my mind as the opinions I’ve conjured up and imposed on reality – and within that deny myself access to what is real

I commit myself to show that ‘taking things personal’ is not normal and not okay – as it has disastrous effects within the acceptance and allowance of letting people act upon their own version of reality – where everyone has a different idea about reality which clashes with everyone’s else’s – resulting in an Earth that gets raped right in front of our eyes but we won’t do a thing about it as we’re all caught up in our little mind bubbles as what we think is real – which ends up in the destruction of what is real in fact

When and as I see myself taking someone’s actions personal and blaming them for my experience – I stop and I breathe – I allow myself to take a step back and look at the bigger picture – as within ‘taking things personal’ I am in fact placing myself in the centre of the Universe as if everything revolves around me – while everything that happens does not revolve around me personally but revolves around everything and everyone as the result of our collective acceptances and allowances – and so instead of blaming and taking someone’s actions personal, I take this point as an opportunity to investigate how I accepted and allowed such behaviour to manifest within this world which is an indication that this behaviour lies within me as well – and so I commit myself to forgive myself for the manifestation of such behaviour and so place myself within a position of self-responsibility within investigating how such behaviour came about within our world and deconstructing it within myself – so I can be a living example that we do not have to accept and allow this behaviour and set a new standard of what is acceptable and what is not within this world, so we can start creating a World that is Best for All



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